Ceberus on: Eulogy.. Photo MOndays

PHOTO MONDAYS IS A NEW SPOT ON THE BLOG FEATURING PHOTOGRAHY. IT WILL BE MOSTLY MY WORK OR IMAGES I FIND ONLINE WHICH I FIND HILARIOUS.

Childhood Innocence
Taken at the Eastbourne train station.

*************************************************************************

In one of my famous El loco hombre moments, My camera and i became permanently separated.I wrote an Eulogy i found most befitting.

My all seeing eye,
You left behind images of truth,
To me and others you brought smiles,
I can only hope your time with me was well spent.
Though you will be replaced,
You shall not be forgotten
Your work will live forever.
Signed
El Loco Hombre
For the family

M on: Intelligent... Fast.... Graceful and dont forget powerful.

O on: Fara bale

This morning my thoughts hovered on a lot of things, My hopes, my fears, and finally dwelling on my dreams. Usually that's the first step for me before a bout of self disappointment for the simple reason that things aren't going exactly to plan.

I looked up and I think I got a message from the supreme being. in the past few weeks, i have been on a path to self discovery. Trying to connect with people i haved rubbed raw, Going to church, basically discovering God. The message was clear and simple. FARA BALE. It was the graffiti written on a truck in front of my car and that just brought me calm.

We all have hopes and dreams and sometimes things dont go the way we want them to. I just want to say FARA BALE because what must be will always be and things will surely fall into place.


SELAH..


**PS FARA BALE comes from Yoruba and translating it litterally it means calm down.

MY on: Yaadein... THE END OF THE STORY

********************************
As the month of Osmanthus approached we settled into a rhythm, i was finally happy in a relationship. It was glaring for the world to see and everyone around me commented on the fact that i was glowing. Mariposa met members of my family and they all fell for her just like i did it was all so perfect but as with all good things life gives, karma (the bitch) must have her say.

Another woman was in my life. and before you crucify me, her being there was decided for me long before i had the ability to make that call and before Mariposa came into my life, I had no objections. But seeing and feeling what true happiness was, i knew that i could never be with Gato (lets call her that). I had told Mariposa about Gato long before we got to where we were and she knew i was trying to break off the engagement.

In the month of Osmanthus, Gato came home in a bid to show me the error of my ways and correct what she believed was a mistake i was making. Looking back, Osmanthus was a month of incidents some near fatal. Mariposa discovered she had a condition that needed serious medical attention and I began living la vida loco as i began to drink more from the battle i found myself in. Gato tried using any means possible to get me to change my mind. From pleading to her parents trying to leverage our joint investments as clout against mine, to my parents and finally when all failed, trying to get to Mariposa to scare her away ( why do women act like that????). Through this, Mariposa stood firm and it was in this period she said those 3 words and more to me.

Osmanthus blended into chrysanthemum and it was time for me to go back home. I left for home knowing that i would be back to the mother country soonest for in the months that had passed i had begun a new life. A life that had everything i could ever wish for. The week before i left, I saw nothing of Mariposa. As i got on the plane i had a feeling, ominous and distinct telling me that something was terribly wrong between my Mariposa and I. It was a feeling i brushed off little did i know.

Home filled me with the warmth that makes it home and i began the process of putting my affairs in order. The first flag should have been the fact that i began to do most of the reaching out unlike before i visited the mother country and when we did speak, it was the issues we spoke on. Marriage was key for her but not for me and i think my obstinate insistence on my position on the subject is what broke the camels back.

I have now come to understand the Nigerian woman's perspective but before then, I was of the opinion marriage is the most unimportant factor in a long term relationship to me it didn't matter if it was legal and dotted lines were signed. Through Mariposa i have come to learn that it is not so and i have come to respect that so i guess you can say lesson learned though the hard way.

I came back home filled with hope of a new life and a new beginning. I came home with the expectations of a man coming back after a long trip to meet his beloved......I met with disappointment.An sms with just 2 words; "welcome back" was all i got. Baffled, for days I waited till I grew tired of waiting so i reached out. She came over and spent roughly an hour before asking that i drop her at home. As i left her at hers, I needed no seer to tell me we were over.

Months have gone by and as I reminisce and think about it, what Mariposa and I shared wasn’t something out of a movie. It was a dream come true. Fact is; nobody knows tomorrow, we can’t even say for sure about the end of the day all we know about is now and right now, I would do it all over and over again with Mariposa and that my friends is what makes her my Kryptonite.


******************************************************************

Kryptonite and I are still in contact though i tend to keep it minimal because of the effect she still has on me. Smaragd, I hope you come out to read this because you're one of the major motivators of me finally letting this out.
mi familia de blogsville let me have your thoughts, Raw and uncut.

My on: Continuing Yaadein

Before i continue, i know the tone of this story is a bit melancholic. Yaadein means Memories in Hindi and Urdu and for me, finally talking about kryptonite is talking a walk down memory lane. with love and life there is a cycle this post is a dip in that cycle but all the same,
Disfruta.

Yaadein continues from here

****************

In the Guava month of the year of the rat, I pleaded she come to Europe and experience my world. It would give me a chance to finally meet the queen of my fantasies. Her job is demanding and that made her coming impossible so i made a decision. I would go to her for if Muhammad wouldn't go to the mountain the mountain must go to Muhammad goes the saying. I began to think of the mother country, a life outside Europe. considering the seemingly fertile environment for businesses the mother country posed i thought of possible investments because i knew it wouldn't be easy living off photography. For a writer, Mariposa had business acumen and together we planned.

I left home and ventured to the mother country.... to see Mariposa,friends and family but more importantly Mariposa. We met for the first time in the upper lobby of a restaurant and Maldita Sea she looked exactly like i had imagined if not more beautiful. In that moment, the sexy voice in my head merged with the beauty that walked up the stairway and became an angel. She could not stay long but we were to meet up in the evening. It was an evening i waited for in anticipation but didn't happen thanks to a certain group of Italians. Damn the pizza and wine lovers but spare the wine
LoL.

The Italians never got the best of me again and our relationship took a new dimension. From lunches to dinners to walks, we started our romance again, viviendo la vida virtual en realidad (living the life we lived on virtually in reality). The first time we kissed it felt like all hell broke loose forget butterflies in the tummy it was more like rapidly melting ice and from that moment on I guess whatever solid fences I had created around myself because of previous circumstances started to crumble and believe me, crumble they did leaving me wondering how they managed to without me knowing.

The lotus month flowed blissfully into the orchid month which happened to be her birth month and all through our romance continued. As with all things bright and beautiful, issues must surface and our perfect bubble began to crack. You see before i met la Mariposa, I had chosen my path (Gato, marriage, children). Finding myself on the same path as hers, the differences in our characters began to show and cause friction but i the passion we both felt continuously covered up those cracks.

The first time i told her i loved her, It was a mutual friend's birthday and I was to be his wing man, preventing him from being foolish but he ended up saving me from the loco hombre that is myself. I digress to say that through her i made a friend who happens to be one of the closest to me till date so perhaps in retrospect, that was why our story ever began ( O tells me that i'm stupidly trying to rationalize). I think i got wasted to be able to say those words but maldita sea, i was gone. She told me about it the next day listening to the Asa track "subway" and did we get a laugh from my antics of the night before, avoiding the seriousness and implication the words had to our relationship.

As the days turned to months, we began to notice the differences in our views. She lives not bothered about not knowing what she wants and me the opposite. She wanting kids and me the opposite, My view on marriage differing from hers terribly. As we discussed more, i saw and I'm sure she did too that there were issues we had to deal with.


TBC

MY on: Yaadein... The story of Kryptonite

This story began in the year of the rat. A tale of love between a photographer and a member of the royal family of dreamers. Call it a love story gone sour if you will nut it's my story. I've been trying to write this for ages but i always seem to get writers block when i start and end up mulling over her... My Kryptonite. Smaragd i hope this brings you out of hiding.
********************************************


It was spring in the year of the Rat and like the trees outside i was in bloom. My photography was getting great reviews both at home in Spain and abroad. Her entry into my life came with a review so you can say it began with a photo. The same photo that apparently seems to be my best work yet. She was my introduction to blogger. To this wonderful world i am now a citizen of. She was and still is a writer and the eloquence in her writing..... absolutely stunning, The mystery she shrouded herself with.....spell binding. Like a moth to a flame i became addicted to her work, Lost in her words i reached out behind the shroud. And what did i find, la mariposa muy bonita.

From cyber-dom into the real world, fate crossed our paths and emails began a long stream of communication that would lead me to this point. Emails led to phone calls and both became more and more frequent. Day and night i had to speak to mariposa looking forward to the new msg on my PDA even in important meetings. The conversation varied from business to pleasure. We spoke about teleporting and if she had somewhat managed to cross continents through space, i doubt if i would have been fazed.

I love a woman with a sexy voice and hers, Maldita sea constantly did it to me. Her voice, so angelic but with a hint of mischief that sends a signal to the discerning of a hint of mischief. I'm no dreamer but if did dream i'm sure i would have spent my periods of REM floating in her world. "Nothing will ever come out of this, we're just friends" became my mantra but it began to sound hollow as i fell deeper and deeper by the day. As i moved around Europe living like the loco hombre i am, the writer became my friend till slowly i lost it in her world.

Ours was something out of a movie like a scene from die another day where Halle Berry comes out of the pool looking so muy caliente and you could literally see/ feel the tension between her and Pierce Brosnan..... Ok so maybe I’m exaggerating and ours wasn’t so intense… it wasn’t even half as dramatic and was in cyberdom but there was that spark, that connection. I mean for two people who had never met, this was more of what I imagined after we spoke.


TBC

My on: And then the fight started

I PLANNED TO DO A POST ON KRYPTONITE BUT JUST THINKING ABOUT HER, GAVE ME THE MOST SEVERE CASE OF WRITER'S BLOCK. SO HERE'S A BIT OF COMIC RELIEF. HOPEFULLY I'LL GET WRITER'S UNBLOCK AND START THE STORY.

EL LOCO HOMBRE
********************************************************************************************
My wife and I are watching Who Wants To Be A Millionaire while we were in bed.

I turned to her and said, 'Do you want to have sex?'

'No,' she answered.

I then said, 'Is that your final answer?'

She didn't even look at me this time, simply saying 'Yes.'

So I said, 'Then I'd like to phone a friend.'

And then the fight started....

********

After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's license to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet at home.

I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and come back later. The woman Said, 'Unbutton your shirt'. So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair. She said, 'That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me' and so she processed my Social Security application. When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the Social Security office. She said, 'You should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten Disability, too'

And then the fight started.....

*******

Saturday morning I got up early, quietly dressed, made my lunch, grabbed the dog, and slipped quietly into the garage. I hooked up the boat up to the truck, and proceeded to back out into a torrential downpour. The wind was blowing 50 mph, so I pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio, and discovered that the weather would be bad all day. I went back into the house, quietly undressed, and slipped back into bed.I cuddled up to my wife's back, now with a different anticipation, and whispered, 'The weather out there is terrible.' My loving wife of 10 years replied, 'Can you believe my stupid husband is out fishing in that?'

And then the fight started ...

**************

My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion, and I kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a nearby table.
My wife asked, 'Do you know her?

'Yes,' I sighed, 'she's my old girlfriend. I understand she took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear she hasn't been sober since.'

'My God!' says my wife, 'Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?'

And then the fight started.....

********************

I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason, took my order first.

'I'll have the strip steak, medium rare, please.'

He said, 'Aren't you worried about the mad cow?'

'Nah, she can order for herself.'

And then the fight started.....

**************************

A woman is standing nude, looking in the bedroom mirror.

She is not happy with what she sees and says to her husband,

'I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly. I really need you to pay me a compliment.'

The husband replies, 'Your eyesight's darn near perfect.'

And then the fight started....

**************************

MY on: Boys will be boys

Here's a collection of photos that i'm hoping will brighten your week. Mine is dull as all the growling on twitter will tell you 'cos my blackberry fried. currently singing " i will survive in a bid to calm myself but it aint working.

Now LAUGH WITH ME>>>

HMM.... i know a blogger who is going through this.. ( i'm sure you do too)

this might be next dont worry, it comes naturally

maybe cos of this perhaps...

The way to this kids heart is through his stomach....CONFIRMED!!!!

Talks about biting off more than you can chew

Look before you land * ahem* leap







ON THE OTHER HAND,
HAVE YOU EVER WONDERED WHY SOME GUYS HAVE *ahem* GAME,
IT MAY BE BECAUSE...
Daddy started them off on this path early



Then they discovered the internet.

Explored the feminine side to discover what women want
then it was time for practicals
and of course Exploration

and then grow up appreciating the good things of life




With love from El loco Hombre

M on: Jineteada....

A Jineteada is traditional Argentine culture. It's a test of horsemanship and only the VERY BEST gauchos ( argie cowboys) Take part. Enjoy

MYon: It's Official... we love life die

• We now growl on Twitter
• Lagos has no drainage
• Ronaldo is a b***ch
  

Now on to other things.

Was chatting with Roodest the other day, (He's my BFAM and a photographer too please visit his website and show him some love) and the convo went something like this

Roodest: oomo.. a nigger jumped out of a plane at 15,000 ft yesterday
MY: a nigger ke
MY: you sure he wasnt an oreo
Roodest: na men.. black .. in and out
MY: wtf
Roodest: i'll post the pix on picasa when i get time
MY: he a disgrace negro
Roodest: oh noo. it wasnt suicide
Roodest: it was skydiving
Roodest: i went skydiving yesterday
Roodest: u don miscacu there
Roodest: negros dont suicide
MY: exactly us negros love life die.

Looking back at it, i think that's why you will never find a black suicide bomber. black people love life and living too much to even consider blowing ourselves up.

O on: when flirting causes drama

Its been a long week and I'm opening a new restaurant tomorrow. I'm stressed out trying to get my robotic mascot to speak interactively when I notice her.

She's in charge of the team decorating the hall.... Prim, sweet n sexy... just my type. Shez intrigued by my attempts to get my chicken to talk and when it finally does, even heracles can see she'z hooked. Starts calling me Mr Chicken she wants to coversate but theres a lot to be done

I let her be, in my mind I'm drawing her in. She catches my eye and I hold hers, wink and move on. In my mind, let the flirting begin.

She calls me back..... I return thinking its on.

"Mr. Chicken i know i look young but how old do you think I am"? She asks

I have 2 kids...a bit of talk then she goes......let me tell you about Jesus.

That.... Put an end to my flirting

Game over....!!!!

Sent from my BlackBerry wireless device from MTN

Cerberus on: Laugh..... scream then go wow

Okay perdona me for going AWOL the last week has been really rough on all three of us. O had a children's day concert to plan and execute and i must say no be small work. It was fun though, the kids had a swell time and i got to see that my man isn't all devil. I fell ill with malaria for the first time since i moved back and had to be hospitalized ( not sexy at all) M too is busy planning a polo tournament in september, the first international peace tournament in Africa so he's practically under the Radar.

To show the family how much we've missed y'all and keep you glued in the den a bit, we each chose a video we found hilarious so share you. One is gonna make you laugh another will make you scream and the last will make you go wooooowwww.

you decide who picked what video lets see how well you know Cerberus.

scream

Find more videos like this on Polo Contacts Worldwide


laugh


go woooooow



Abrazos a todos

EL loco Hombre ( MY just in case you didn't know jejejeje)